Self-improvement Is Masturbation. So Is Playing With Your Wee-wee.

 

 

Bonjour mes petits infants.
How was your day?  I am listening.
Is it just me, or is it that every step you take up in the ladder of employees from peon to CEO, that there is a mathematic exponentiality of the increasing stupidity?
Here’s a test if you are on one of the bottom rungs: at 1:45 ask one of your fellow serfs what time it is, he will most likely respond “One forty-five.”  Or, “Quarter to two.” Or, “Screw off, you bother me.”
Now ask one of the higher-ups, and if my theory is correct they will respond something like this: “Three quarters past one.” Or, “Half an hour to a quarter past two.” Or, “Screw off, you bother me.  But first explain to me the concept of ice.”   Or they might just tell you they can’t because they are wearing the watch with the hands, instead of the one with the numbers.
In any case I am right.  Va te faire foutre!
And now, a haiku.
Do you Masturb8?
Try it with your other hand.
Pass the tissues, please.
            —NPX
I hope you get the joke about the noose in the photos.
That’s it, see you at Loonies.

 

(Note: Original pictures from this older post have been accidentally lost to time.)

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